Ek sharabi ne apni wife ko office party se sms kiya…
“Party khatam hone wali hai,
ye last peg hai,
main aadhe ghante me ghar pahuch jaunga….
Agar nahin pahucha to iss sms ko dubara padh lena…
your love.”

Air hostess to Pathan: What will you have sir?
Pathan : Wallah, hamare liye Taveez wala chai laao
Air Hostess: Abbe Afghanistan ke Chapad-Ganju! Woh Taveez nahi tea-bag hai!!

Kabhi Tum Gor Se Dekho Aaina,
Wah Wah!
Kabhi Tum Gor Se Dekho Aaina;
Khud Hi Hanskar Kahoge…
Made in China! Made in China!!

Ek ladki ne ek ladke ko facebook mein unfriend kar diya.
Ladke ko jab pata chala usne ladki ko message bheja: Tumne mujhe friends list se kyun nikala?
Ladki: Kyunki tum gande ladke ho!
Ladka: Main ganda??!! wo kaise?
Ladki: Ek mahine se tumhe facebook mein dekh rahi hoon, tumhari profile picture se pata chalta hai ku tumne kapde change nahin kiye, Roj unhi kapdo mein dikhayi dete ho!!
Ladka: Achcha hua iss bewakoof ne khud hi mujhe nikal diya

Neeche hai dharti, Upar aakash hai,
.
Dekihye zara…
.
Neeche hai dharti, Upar aakash hai..
.
.
Dicky Khol ke bola ACP,
“Oh god, Yahaan pe toh laash hai”

Lady Beggar:
Aee.. bhaiya, 1 rupaya de de.. 3 din se bhuki hoon!
.
Bhaiya:
3 din se bhuki hai toh 1 rupaiye ka kya karegi…??
.
Lady Beggar:
Sahab, Weight check karungi, kitna kam ho gaya hai!!

Lord Shiva: Mera Trishul kahan hai ?
Parvati: Rajnikanth le gaya.
Shiva: Kyun?
Parvati: Maggi khaane ke liye !!!

Sukhi vivahik jeevan ka Raaj
.
.
.
.
Aaj bhi RAAJ hai!!

Prabhu.. Yeh kya Moh-Maya hai?
Apna Baccha roye, toh dil me dard hota hai.
Aur doosre ka roye, toh sir me!
Apni Biwi roye, toh sir me dard hota hai.
Aur doosre ki roye, toh dil me!

Bahu: Maaji, yeh abhi tak nahi aaye, kahi koi ladki ka chakkar toh nahi hai unke ?

Maaji: Are kalmuhi tu toh hamesha galat hi sochti hai, Ho sakta hai ke kisi truck ke niche aa gaya ho!

Khuda ek bar use ye ehsas dela de,
.
kitna intjar hai zara use bata de,
.
har pal dehkte hai rasta usi ka,
.
na intjar karna pade
.
mujhe aisi neend sula de.

kitna dard hai dil me dikhaya nahi jata...
gambhir hai kisa sunaya nahi jata.....
ik bar g bhar ke dekh lo is chehre ko,
,kiyon ki bar bar kafan uthaya nahi jata..?

wo ro ro kar apne dard ko batae rahe...
hamari tanhaiyon se aankhe churate rahe...
phir b hame bewafai ka ilzaam mila yaro....
kiyon ki har dard ko ham hans hans ke chhipate rahe..?

Hasna aur Hasana Koshish hai Meri,

Har koi Khush rahe ye Chahat hai Meri,

Bhale hi Koi Mujhe Yaad kre ya na kre,

Har Apne ko Yaad krna Aadat he Meri.....

Mohabbat humse na hogi??
suna hai is mohabt me bohat nuksan hota hai,
mehakta jhoomta jevan ghamo k naam hota hai,
suna hai chain kho kr wo sehr se sham rota hai,
mohabbat jo b krta hai bohat bdnaam hota hai,
mohabbat humse na hogi
suna hai is mohabbat me kahin bhi dil nahi lgta,
bina uski nigahon main koi mosam nahi jachta,
khfa jis se mohabbat ho wo jevan bhr nahi hansta,
bohat anmol hai jo dil ujjar kar phir nahi basta.
mohabbat humse na ho gi.

Ek Haseen Pal Ki Zarurat He Hame,
Beete Kal Ki Zarurat He Hame,
Sara Zamana Ruthe To Ruthe,
Jo Kabhi Na Ruthe Aise Yaar Ki Zarurat He Hume.

Teri Yadon Ke Siva Koi Khayal Na Aaya,
Mere Sawalon Ka Koi Jawab Na Aaya.
Ham To Raat Bhar Jagte Rahe Teri Yadon Me,
Aur Tumhe Sokar Bhi Hamar Khwab Na Aaya.

Har mulaqaat par waqt ka
taqaaza hua,

Har yaad par dil ka dard taaza
hua,

Suni thi sirf gazlon mein judaai
ki baatein,

Ab khud par beeti to haqeeqat
ka andaaza hua...

Chupke se chand ki roshni aap ki ho jaye,

Dheere se hawa aap ko kuch kahe jaye,

Dil me jo hai use mang lo rab se,

Hum dua karenge ki aap ki her chahat puri ho jaye…

GirL A.T.M pe Pappu se..
.
.

Girl : bhaiya mujhe apna balance check
krna h..
Ap meri help kr do plz..
.
.
.
.
.
.

Pappu use ek zor ki laat marta h or
ladki gir jati h.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

Pappu : tera balance to bahot khaRAb hai

Teacher : Make A Sentence In Which
One Word Repeated 4 Times..
.
.
Sardar : Lara Dutta Marries Brian
Lara And She Becomes Lara Lara..!

Wife: Btao Tmhe Main Kitni Achchi Lagti Hoon
Husband : Bahut Zyada
Wife : Phir Bhi Kitni
Husbnd : Itni Ki Dil Chahta Hai Tumhari Jaisi 1
Aur Le Aaun.

Baazi E Ishq Is Tarah Se Hum Haare
Yaaron
Zakhm Pe Zakhm Lage Dil Pe Hamare
Yaaron
Koi To Aisa Ho Jo Ghaao Pe Marham
Lagaye
Dushman Na Bano Saare Ke Saare
Yaaron..!

Ek Roz Yunhi Chalte Chalte Uss Ne Pochaa Mujh
Se,
Koun Ho Tum?
Aur Koun Hu Me?
Me Muskuraya Aur Kaha Raasta Hu Me Aur Manzil
Ho Tum!

Kahi Khamoshi Me Bhi Iqraar Hai,
Kahi Apni Sanso Ka Koi Aur Haqdar Hai..
To Kahi Khud Ke Dilme Kisi Anjaan Ke Liye
Mohabbat Beshumar Hai,
Aur Shayad Isi Fasaane Ka Naam Pyar Hai..!

Khuwab Banke Tmhari Ankho Me Samana H,
Dawa Banke Tumhara Har Dard Mitana H,
Kabul Hain Muje Jamane Bhar Ki Nafrat,
Par Banke Pyar Tumhara Tumhe Pana Hai..

Bas Ek Choti Si Haan Kr Do,
Humare Naam Is Tarah Sara Jahan Kar Do!
Wo Mohabbtain Jo Tumare Dil M Hain,
Un Ko Zuban Pr Lao 0r Bayan Kr Do!
Aaj Bas Aap Kaho 0r Kehti Hi Jao,
Hum Bas Sunte Rahe Aisa Be-Zuban Kr Do!
Wahi Purani Dastan Heer Ranjha Ki,
Tarikh Mohabbat Ki Phir Se Jawan Kr Do.

wafa ke badle bewafai mila,
mujhe tere mohbbat me rusawai mila.
jamane ne bahot roka nakar mohbbat,
tujhse sath mangi maine magar tanhai mila.

Hoti Nahi Mohabbat Surat Se,
Mohabbat To Dil Se Hoti Hai..
.
.
.
Kyunki.
.
.
.
Surat Unki Khud Hi Pyari Lagti
Hai,
Kadar Jinki Dil Mein Hoti Hai..

Jab Samne Hote Ho Tum Na
Jane Kyo Hosh Kho Baith The Hai Hum..
Milti Hai Nazar Jab Jab Tumse..
Sab Kuch Bhul Jate Hai Hum..
Hoti Hai Tu Itne Kareeb..
Phir Bhi Dil Ki Baat Kehne Se Ruk Jate Hum.

Maut aur mohabatt
toh bas naam se
badnaam h.Asli Dard
toh 'Slow internet'
deta hai.

She:- Tu itna acha he
fir kya reason
hai ki teri koi GF nahi
he?
.
.
Me:- Tu ban ja
.
.
.
She:- nahi tu mera best
friend hai..
.
.
.
.
.
Me:- Bas yehi reason
hai..

Durse dekha
to to to
durse dekha to to to
sher dikhaii
diya.
es liye me pass nhi gya.

Aapki Ada Se Hum Madhosh Ho Gaye, Aap Ne

Palat Kar Dekha To Hum Behosh Ho Gaye,

Yahi Ek Baat Kehni Thi Aapse,
Na Jaane Kyun Aapko 

Dekhte Hi Hum Khamosh Ho Gaye..

DIL Me Ek ChoTa Sa AshIYana He
Waha Pe Ek pYara Sa NaZarana He
Par Ye BaaT Sabse ChhupanI He
KI WahI Pe To Jaan Apka ThIkana He.

Main Tujhse Aaj Ek Waada Karta Hun,
Ki Main Saare Wadein Nibhaunga,
Per Ek Waada Mujhe Tujhse Bhi Lena Hai,
Jo Tuh Gar Kabhi Mujhe Dard De
Bass Ye Keh Dena Ki Tuh Anjaan Tha,
Varna Main Jeete Ji Marr Jaunga !!

I couldn’t tell you
how much I love
you,
not even if
the sky was my
paper
and the ocean was
my ink.
I Love You so
much..!!

You make me smile
for no reason ..
You make me laugh
at unfunny things ..
But
most of all ...
You make me love
you when I
shouldn't be
loving you

Sincere people
sometimes
may not be in a
position to
pull you up.. But...
They always think
of
the
ways to save you
from
falling.

When you love
someone, it's
something. When
someone loves you,
it's another thing.
When you
loves the person
who loves you back,
it's everything.

When you're mad at
someone
you
love,
be careful what you
say
because
your mind gets
angry but your
heart still cares

One day, you'll meet
someone who
doesn't care about
your past because
they want to be
with you in your
future.

"If there ever
comes a day when
we can’t be
together, keep me
in your heart, I’ll
stay there
forever."

Heart Touching
Lines -
Ansu Muskuraht se jyada ache hote h....

Pucho kyu ???? 
.
.
.

Kyoki
muskuraht sab ke liye hoti h
aur ansu kisi ek ke liye hote h

Usne Mujh Se Poocha..
Ki Sab Se Zyada Kya Pasand Hai Tumhein.
.
.
Mai Bahut Der Tak Usay Dekhta Raha,
Bas Yeh Soch Kar.
Ki Khud Jawab Ho Kar Us Ne Sawal Kyun Kiya...!!

Zindegi mein koi ek Shakhs Toh Yun Mile,...
Ki Woh Mile Toh Sakoon Mile...

Khuda Ne Mujhse Kha Tu Chahe,
Lakh Sajde Kar,
Na Vo Teri Thi Na Teri He Or Na Teri Hogi
Humne Bhi Dil Se Khuda Se Kha 
Wo Meri Chahe Ho Ya Na Ho Aye Khuda
Mujhe Usi Se Pyar Tha,
Usi Se Pyar H Or Usi Se Rhega.

Aaj Har Ek Pal Khubsoorat Hai,
Dil Me Bas Ek Teri Surat H,
Kuch Bhi Kahe Ye Duniya Gum Nahi,
Duniya Se Zyada Hum Ko Teri Zarurat H.
Miss U

Kyu Masoom Zindagi Uske Liye Barbad Karta Hai. Jo Tere Maatam Pe Bhi Samil Nahi Hoga. Jise Tu Jeete Ji Nahi Paa Sakaa. Wo Marne Ke Bad Tujhe Haasil Kya Hoga

Pyaar Ke Beech Yeh Kaisi Duri Hai, Mai Teri Aawaj Tak Nahi Sun Sakta Ye Kaisi Majburi Hai, Tu To Shayad Khush Bhi Ho Apno Ke Beech, Yahan Jeene Marne Ke Bare Me Soch Raha Hu Itni Halat Buri Hai...

Sanam Tu Meri Chahat Ka Ehsas Rehne De, Humesha Ki Liye Nai Toh Kuch Pal Apne Pass Rehne De, Tu Mujhe Chahti Nai Pata Hai Mujhe, Tu Meri Khushi Ke Liye Jhute Pyar Ka Ehsas Rehne De, Kambhaqt Is Zindagi Ka Kya Pata Kab Chale Jaye Duniya Se, Sanam Ek Pal Toh Apne Sath Rehne De..

Dil Me Hai Ek Baat Zuban Pe Laun Kaise, Haal Is Dil Ka Duniya Ko Bataun Kaise, Wo Kehta Hai Gum Hai To Tu Rota Kyu Nahi? Aansu Sookh Gaye Ankhon Ke Ro Ro Kar, Ye Baat Use Samjhaun Kaise..?

Zindagi Khubsurat Hai Par Mujhe Jina Nahi Aata, Har Chiz Me Nasha Hai Par Mujhe Pina Nahi Aata, Sab Mere Bina Ji Shakte Hai, Sirf Mujhe Hi Kisike Bina Jina Nahi Aata.

Yun To Sadmo Mein Bhi Hans Leta Tha Main, Aaj Kyu Bewajah Rone Laga Hun Main, Barson Se Hatheliyan Khali Hi Rahi Meri, Phir Aaj Kyu Lagaa Sab Khone Laga Hun Main

Kirdar Badal Gaye, Ab Badli Si Yeh Kahani Hai, Zindagi Mein Mithaas Thi Ab Zeher Ke Paani Hai, Mere Zakhmon Par Marham Na Lagaao, Mere Paas Bas Yehi Ek Us Ke Pyaar Ki Nishani Hai.

Dard Jitna Hai Meri Nigaho Me. . . Paoge Na Utna Kisi Ki Raho Me . . . Bitani Chahte The Zindagi Jiski Bahon Me . . . Maut Bhi Na Mil Payi Unki Panaho Me . .

Hum Na Mile Apse To Yaad Milegi, Hum Jo Mile Apse To Fariyad Milegi, Maut Khamosh Kar Degi Zubaan Ko Meri, Par Apko Har Kadam Pe Humari Aawaj Milegi,

Zindagi Se Chale Hai Elzam Lekar.. Bohot Jee Chuke Unka Naam Le Kar.... Akele Bate Karenge Wo In Sitaro Se... Jab Ham Chale Jayenge Unhe Ye Sara Aasma De Kar.

Aaj Promise Day Hai Mujhse Wada Karo
Kabi Na Mera Dil Dukhaoge
Kabi Na Mujhe Chhod Ke Jaoge
Khusi Aur Gam Me Mohabbat Nibhaoge
Aur Sirf Mujhe Hi Chahoge
Wada Karo Sanam..?
Happy Promise Day
Happy Valentine Day

valentine's day z
only 1 dayz away..
.
So remember..
.
Its nt too late..
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Break-up & save
money...!

Jab Aati Hai Yaad Tumhari
To Kar Ke Ankhe Band
Tumhe Miss Kar Lete Hain
Mulaqaat Roz Ho Nahi Paati
Isliye
Khayalon Me Hi Tumhe Kiss
Kar Lete Hain..!
Happy Kiss Day
Happy Valentine Day

what is success?
in 1988 schin Tendulkar failed in English in 10th std..
Now in 2010,10th std's English 1st lesson is about TENDULKER
Thats success..

Very short, but great lines….
“Get a Person like a mirror”…
Bcz wen you cry… It never laughs..!

Kiya kahe ke kuch kaha nahi jata dard mitha hai par saha nahi jata 

dosti ho gayi hai is kadar apse ke

 bina yaad kiye apko raha nahi jata

Raat Andhere Mein Mere Ghar Ko Jalaya Kis Ne
Mujhko Yeh Kaam Bhi Lagta Hai Tumhara Yaaro!
Hum Na Honge Tou Bohat Yaad Karoge Humko
Naam Likh Likh Ke Mitaaoge Hamara Yaaro….!

Dil Ke Angan Se Chand Ka Didar Ho Gaya
Main Deewana Ho Gaya Chand Badlon Mein Kho
Gaya
Maine Badal Hatne Ka Inteezar Kiya
Tab Tak Chand Kisi Aur Ka Ho Gaya

Jab Kabhi Ghazal Main Tumhara Tazkara Karon
To Tumharey Khushboo Main Bassey Khat Yaad
Aaye
Jab Kabhi Barish Main Moti Ki Manind Chamkti
Boond Ko Dekhon
To Tumhari Piyasi Ankhin Yaad Aaye
Jab Kabhi Andheri Raat Main Chamktey Sitaron Ko
Dekhon
To Tumhari Nazroon Ki Shirarat Yaad Aaye

A REAL RELATIONSHIP
Has Fights, Trust, Faith, Tears, Pains,
Arguments, Patience, Secrets, Jealousy And
LOVE.

When life gives
you a hundred
reasons to cry,
show life that
you have a
thousand reasons
to smile.

KEEP people in your life
that truly love you
motivate you
encourage you
inspire you
enhance you &
make you happy
If you have people who do
NONE of the above
Let them go!